Soul Carnage

Why don't we relentlessly and recklessly pursue where our hearts lead us? 
Yes, it's carnal. 
Barbaric even. 
The things we see,
We want, we  crave. 
Jesus why doesn't my soul crave You, crave the things in Your heart? 
This wicked world has enchanted my soul and I can't break my gaze. 
In the caverns and basements of our souls we crave a heaven, we crave God Almighty. 
Yet my heart cherishes the dregs, the road scum of this present world 
Holds tightly and clings to it with its last breaking wave of strength. 
Jesus, be my strength. 
We root for the sacred to eternally bond with the wretched on the daily. 
Maybe
Just maybe
The depths, the trenches, and gullies of our very souls crave this only because it is a hollow image, but an image none the less, of a savior. 
And our hearts chase after the lesser.
The sweet liquor and carnal sleep because its thrilling and maybe in the end we fancy ourselves some wretched sort of savior. 
How we need a savior. How we need you, Jesus. 
We fancy ourselves saving the underdog, or maybe it's more that we've given up hope. 
We've lost hope in ourselves and forgotten the return of the Lion. 
As in the holy scene in The Lion, Witch, and the Wardrobe when Lucy cries out

'Aslan, You've come back.
Is this real.'

Even blessed Lucy lost her childlike faith in the Lion of Judah. 
Or maybe it's just that we're miserable, selling ourselves to the cheap nights because we forget we were made for more than this world. 
For golden back roads guarded by pearl covered gates. 
For our souls to touch this world through being in the dark, but living with light. 
Yet still, my surface soul speaks loudly. 
It wants that drag, that drink, that boy, this world. 
May the depths of our souls burst through. 
May Jesus combust our souls with his sovereign fire from heaven. 
May our Savior make us steadfast and may the Lion of Judah return and find us faithful.

Come, Lord Jesus. 




Go forth and live. 
<>< xoxo Lyd